Boston to take ALCS

By Josh Griffin

After the finale of "Joe Millionaire," my favorite six-week television series ever, I can now turn my attention back to sports - namely baseball. This is part one of my baseball season preview, starting with the American League.

Start by throwing out all teams who will not be around in May. Kansas City, Detroit, Baltimore, Tampa Bay and Texas have as good a chance at the postseason as I do graduating summa cum laude. On the upshot, Texas has hired Buck Showalter, so the year after they fire him, the Rangers will be world champions.

Of the remaining teams, seven have a realistic shot at the postseason - Boston, New York, Chicago, Minnesota, Oakland, Anaheim and Seattle.

While the Yankees may make the United Nations jealous with their international representation, their geriatric club of starting pitchers cannot repeat the success of previous years, and they will not be back in the World Series. Oakland has made lateral moves in the offseason, but if there's a safer bet in sports than the Harlem Globetrotters, it is that General Manager Billy Beane errors as often as Nostradamas.

The White Sox are a trendy sleeper pick, but they will go the course of hair bands and fade into Bolivia by August. Seattle lost Sweet Lou and added Santa Clara alum Randy Winn which is a wash after adding new manager Bob Melvin. However, by adding little bench depth and relying prominently on Jeff Cirillo, they have taken away any real shot at the postseason.

Anaheim has pitching depth and no easy outs in their lineup. None of these teams will be there in the end, because come October, the American League Championship Series will feature two unlikely teams.

Mark it down now folks, and contact your connections in Vegas. Boston over Minnesota in six.