W: The worst letter of the alphabet
By Marcos Moreno
As a serious journalist, it's my duty to protect and uphold our national alphabet. But lately, to my concern, not all 26 letters in that alphabet have been achieving their full potential.
Of course, I'm speaking about the most unpopular letter in our lexicon, the letter "W." Take a minute to think about all the terrible words that begin with "W," and you might understand what I'm talking about: wound, wart, wind chill factor, the West Nile virus, just to name a few. Already, things are not looking good for "W."
As you may know, "W" has a long-standing history of beginning words that signify awful, hideous things in our culture. In the genre of horror, "W" has the market cornered with witches, warlocks and werewolves. And in the insect world, wasps are the most threatening creatures out there.
Also, most questions begin with "W": who, what, why, where, when. I don't understand why "W" has to be so pushy. What's the deal with asking so much and prying into people's personal lives? "W" is such a nosy letter, which no doubt has contributed to the dissatisfaction with its usage.
Oftentimes, creating alliteration elicits a positive effect as far as sound and connotation. This is not the case with "W." The Wild West was a ruthless place where justice took a back seat to crime; "Wrong Way" signs are a frustration on the road; and the World Wide Web is a source of consternation for those of us tired of getting spam e-mails.
It seems as though the more "W's" added to a term actually cause an increase in the negativity of the subject.
The problem, however, spreads beyond words. Take work, for instance. It's completely harmless until the destructive implication of "W" goes into effect.
I've often noticed that people who do work are commonly unhappy; they worry a lot, which causes wrinkles; and then they waste a lot time doing nothing. Waking up early can't be very much fun, either. Maybe it's that the workdays are too long, and the weekends are too short. Perhaps the real problem with those people is their wages because taxes withhold so much money.
On the other hand, people without work don't seem happier. It's kind of strange thinking that one little "W" could do so much damage, but as a columnist, I'm aware of the power that letters hold.
Remember, Santa Clara, that there are so many other positive terms and expressions out there that don't include "W." Don't be discouraged about its condemnation. I, myself, feel that 25 letters is more than enough to make a complete alphabet. This alphabet has one U -- is there really a need for a double? I think not.
Marcos Moreno is a senior English major.